Photo by Karolina Grabowska from Pexels

The last few days, months really, have been quite heady, and my head is feeling the strain. It’s an overworked muscle in need of a rest day. Can the brain pull a hammy or experience a Charlie-horse? No, that’s just silly and anatomically incorrect, but it’s a similar sensation. It’s like brain freeze brought on by too much thinking, feeling, and experiencing.

I don’t want to think right now! My brain needs a break, a vacation, or a long-term sabbatical. Could you imagine if that was possible? Your mind hands in its walking papers and strolls out the door with a wave and a later bitches. Is it possible? No, but it feels like I’m half a dozen thoughts away from my brain unionizing and going on strike.

Not that I’m opposed to unions and protecting workers from greedy billionaires who think Scrooge was a misunderstood hero. Am I talking about Scrooge the Duck or Scrooge the Dickens character? Huh, now that’s the depth of intellectual conversation I’m capable of having at the moment.

Which is probably bad? 

There’s so much going on right now, and pretending it isn’t a gong show is absurd. Is that a term used everywhere or only in Canada. Gong show, if you’re unfamiliar, means everything is a disaster. It’s usually meant in a fun way, but it can also be ironic because everything is a f**king gong show.

We should talk about it, right? We should share our thoughts, feelings, and opinions. Ideally, we’d thoughtfully addressed it all and not yell at each other. How unlikely is that? I would crunch the numbers, but my brain hurts.

I did talk about it on Friday, and you’re welcome to read my thoughts on recent events. (https://kerileeg.com/2021/01/08/the-truth-is-complicated/). Actually, I was surprised that so many of you read it. I thought, with the subject matter, that it would be a lame-duck with plum sauce. Which is an odd analogy for a vegetarian. But people read it and I’m shocked. Thank you! It was a welcomed surprise.

I write to vent, process, and clean out my mental attic. When you read my words? It means a lot, and I heart you all so much. Okay, this is getting mushy, and emotions terrify me so, on with the show.

There’s a time and a place for intellectual and thoughtful discussions about global events. Right now? In this moment? I’m tapped out. I can’t find the words to express everything I’m thinking and feeling. My mind is overflowing. I’m feeling a lot of emotions, and when that happens, words fail me. I can’t articulate my thoughts in a meaningful way. I end up contributing to the noise and chaos.

That’s not helpful so, I should shut up.

If I’m not going to talk about the heavy stuff? What am I going to talk about? Something light, breezy, and possibly fluffy. In my experience, when the world gets too dark, then I need to look for something to create some light. That’s especially true on days like today when there doesn’t seem to be any natural sources of light. It’s time to rub some sticks together and create a spark.

And yes, that analogy has burnt itself out, which serves as proof that my brain has been strained a little too far. The remedy? Huh, professional help, perhaps? No! I can’t afford such extravagances which is an indictment of our mental health access in this country. But that’s a different discussion for a different day. A day, preferably, when the intellectual part of my thinking organ is functioning at optimal capacity.

That day is not this day so, I’ll just stop babbling on like a fool. 

You know what? I want to talk about one of my favourite things on this planet, and it’s super fluffy. Could it be something with a wet nose, perhaps? Oo, and a wiggly behind. Some heavy panting would be cute too. If your mind went to unspeakable places then, *giggle* that’s on you. It also reminds me of a horrible gynaecologist joke. Horrible! Not funny. Did I laugh? Yes, it was so bad I couldn’t help myself. It’s also mildly inappropriate, and out of respect for those of you who have class and dignity, I’ll keep it hush-hush.

What was I saying?

Wet noses, wiggling behinds, and the beautiful sound of happy panting because you scratched the sweet spot. Oh, sing it with me, these are a few of my favourite things. There’s nothing that makes me happier, and if you want to see me positively giddy? This is how you do it!

Just thinking about it…I just sighed in contentment, and there’s a bubble of giggles sitting in my chest. I’m suppressing a squeal, and there are only a few things that can make me squeal. This, what I experienced a few days ago, is one of the purest forms of happiness I can imagine.

Am I drawing the suspense out too long? Okay, you’re right, I’m getting on with it.

If we’re going to be friends, then there’s one very important thing you need to know, understand, and accept. I love animals more than I love people. Animals are better people than people and that’s just a fact. Would I say that it’s science? Sure, but I don’t have the data to back me up. I have nothing more than a gut feeling, and my gastrointestinal system says: Animals make better people than people.

Go on, argue with me but first turn on the news and then report back. Got it? I’m right, right? People are so busy people-ing while animals are busy cuddling and being adorable. I know the chain has already been forged, but they should put human beings on the bottom and animals on the top. It would be a weirder, but a better world by my reckoning.

Or did some author already ruin that theory?

From what I’ve been able to deduce, normal people, and I should put that word in quotations, fall into one of two categories. You’re either a dog person or a cat person, and your choice says a lot about your personality. Apparently. I don’t think that’s scientifically or psychologically accurate, but okay Cool Beans, whatever floats your boat.

Since the norm has never felt like home, I live in a magical land where I love all animals equally. Well, except for horses. They creep me out. Their brains are too big, and I’m absolutely sure they’re plotting to take over the planet. They’re just biding their time, lulling us into a false sense of dominance, and waiting for the moment to make their move.

You’ll see, they’ll be putting saddles on our backs in no time! How does this vibe with my food chain reversal theory? Uh, stop using my own logic against me.

Besides, you were worried about the apes! Nope, horses are the real enemy.

Then again, I just checked the news, and maybe a global horse take over wouldn’t be the worst idea. There’s a horse’s ass joke in there, but I’m resisting the urge. I couldn’t resist telling you about the joke and, since you’re a smart person, I’m sure you’ll execute the punchline quite admirably. 

So, which category do you fit in? Are you a dog or a cat person? Or, are you like me, and any animal that wants a snuggle is a friend?

I just want snuggles! I can’t walk past a four-legged friend and not say, hello beautiful. It’s impossible. I even say hi to crows, seagulls and pigeons. And yes, I know they only have two legs, but they belong to the superior species so, I pay my respects.

If I had my way, I’d rescue every stray dog, cat, and domesticated creature. I’d give them a home and spend the rest of my life making sure they’re all loved. They’d have all the treats their bellies could hold and all the snuggles they wanted. I’d treat each of them like the majestic beings that they are.

I love animals! I can’t tell you how much I love them because there aren’t enough words. I can’t watch movies or tv shows with animals in them because the animal might, possibly, get hurt. Seeing an animal hurt? I can’t handle it. Did I already mention how much I love animals?

Yes, several times.

Right, a few weeks before Christmas, my brother and his family adopted two pitbull puppies. And yes, I know the stereotypes about pitbull’s, but they are actually quite lovely dogs if you train them and treat them right. That’s usually true with most animals and people. Treat them with love, compassion, and dignity, then watch them treat others the same way.

Funny how kindness works, ain’t it?

Tragically, I didn’t think I’d get to meet these precious little boys because of the whole pandemic situation. We’re all careful, and breaking the rules is something we avoid. Even if it means missing the puppy years? Oh, my heart! But they sent us a lot of videos and pictures, which is almost as good.

As good as meeting them? No, silly, not even almost.

Ah, but here’s the part you know is coming. I got to meet the pups in person! I’m still squealing. You can’t hear me squealing, but I’m doing it right now as I type these words. Eeeeeeeee.

I had to drop somethings off at my brothers’ home, but we were super careful. Masks were worn, and the required distance was maintained. I never went into the house, but those pups came out to meet me. We were safe, extremely cautious, and we followed the guidelines laid out by our local CDC.

Oh, they’re going to be big boys! Right now, they’re small enough to pick up and cuddle. Their fur is still loose and silky. They’ve got a lot of growing to do! The best part? They love kisses. As I held them, they kept trying to pull my mask down so they could kiss me, and my heart nearly exploded. 

Spontaneous human combustion is real!

Don’t worry, I pulled the mask back up immediately, but the kisses and the cuddles sent a shock wave of joy through my body. I think I levitated. It was incredible, beautiful, and I can’t tell you how much I needed such a simple, uncomplicated expression of love.

With everything going on, my heart and my mind needed this moment. I can’t process anything else. My mind is full, and my heart is feeling heavy. At that moment, with those pups and seeing my brother in person, I felt lighter than I have in months. I could’ve cried out of sheer relief.

It was so simple, pure, and the break was perfection. God, I needed the break! I think we all do, don’t we? It’s okay to stop scrolling. It’s okay to walk away from the news. It’s okay to get lost in a fantasy world for a little while. It’s okay to stop, recharge, and revisit things that keep you grounded in the good.

That’s a note to self, BTW. I forget and get lost in toxic rabbit holes. But then I meet cute puppies! Oh, my heart feels so much better now.

Please, if you need it, take a break and take care of yourself. You’re precious, and you’re needed. Be good to yourself. Do something nice for your heart and mind. You’re totally worth it!

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